Faux News Network political report Stacy Conundrum filed this report about newly developed Congressional acronyms.
The Office of Congressional Public Relations today announced two new acronyms that will be used starting immediately. They are designed to relieve the workload on members of Congress.
The first acronym is TAP which will be short for our “thoughts and prayers" go out the victims of whatever shooting just occurred. The second acronym is SH which will stand for "stuff happens."
A spokesperson said, "The members of Congress are busy with many issues and concerns. These new acronyms are necessary to save valuable time. This is especially important with the increased number of mass shootings. The acronyms will indicate to the public that Congress is indeed concerned about the problem.
"At the office of Public Relations, we will continue to develop appropriate acronyms so the public will know how sympathetic Congress is to their concerns."
A Congressional aide said, “My boss will love these. In a week or so when the next shootings occur, he can tweet ‘#massmurderTAP’ and he’s done. Here is another example. Let’s say an oil train derails in the middle of a town and causes massive destruction. My boss can tweet ‘#oiltrainSH’. This will save him a ton of work and allow him to spend more time with lobbyists.”
Ms Conundrum is seeking comments on this new development and the acronyms.
Aaaargh! Too real.